Charles Duhigg - Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection
“Conversions can change our brains, bodies and how we experience the world.”
Charles Duhigg is a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and bestselling author known for his work on productivity and human behavior. In Supercommunicators, he explores the science behind meaningful conversations, revealing how certain people excel at connecting with others by understanding the hidden layers of communication.
Medium: Book
How strongly I recommend it: 8/10
Other Recommendations: Here
10 Takeaways
Every discussion is a negotiation, and the prize is to figure out what everyone wants.
The right conversion at the right moment can change everything.
Super communicators know how to evoke synchronisation by encouraging people to match their own communication.
Happy couples argue better, not less- successful relationships aren't conflict-free—partners simply respond to each other's emotions rather than just the content of disagreements.
4 Rules of communication: 1. Pay attention to what kind of conversation everyone wants. 2. Share your goals and ask what others are seeking. 3. Ask about others' feelings and share your own. 4. Explore if identities are important for the discussion.
Successful conversions drive speakers to express their needs, goals, beliefs and emotions. In unsuccessful conversions, speakers talk about themselves.
Reciprocity is not about matching vulnerability to vulnerability, sorrow to sorrow; instead, it is about being emotionally available.
Prepare for your conversions before they begin. Thinking about it a little more before we open our mouths can have a far-reaching impact.
The person with the least power should start the conversation.
Don’t generalise- It is useful to ask people to share their own experiences and describe their own stories.